The birth of the first child in the most sad, as if I tasted the bitter life six

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The birth of the first child in the most sad, as if I tasted the bitter life six

2017-08-12 23:06:41 124 ℃

Said the seven bitter life:Life and death, hatred, love, not. May be the first 27 years of life is too smooth, so God used the baby thing to torture me, in the first year, the birth of the baby except death, I tasted the bitter life completely six, although there is little life birth, the joy of growth doped them, but most of the time I was with husband, mother-in-law, life, depression, disease tired these words to fight all kinds of contradictions, excited, let me see people do cold, followed by irritability, anxiety, unbearable, but this year has finally passed, with the arrival of autumn, my mood is sunny, recalled this sad one year, as are the fog and overcast day, write down these words here, to commemorate my unforgettable year.

I was sitting out, her mother did not accompany a night, the reason is that her amazing grunt, in her own words, is "will keep you can't sleep", so the hospital all night my mother and her husband, even with her husband, he slept with pigs that is my mother at night to feed her child, diapers, I stayed for seven days, the mother accompanied me for seven days, then it can not hold up, I let her go back, the first time I saw a woman hypocritical, play the mouth not involved, before children goodtimesbar, students the child after her illness in succession, the first is the stomach, then leg pain, then the heart is not good, not noisy, too tired, so I tried to edge after discharge of pain to change diapers, then decisively diapers, mother-in-law afraid to spend Money, said several times that of diapers is not good, then I really unbearable, she shouted a sentence,"The kids can use diapers, you take her home to take care of you, love what what, I use diapers."My mother-in-law completely gone, then with her husband cried, my husband and I have children broke out after the first argument in the clamor of children crying, I hold the children back to the home, this is a live half a month.

It was my depression came, every day upset can't sleep sleep, every hair, every day in addition to the child, is to go to the hospital for massage, because my milk was not enough, the children do not eat milk, every day the kids fall asleep, I sat on the bus to the two car to do massage, so lasted for many days, then the milk arrived, I had a kind of painful mastitis, who can not be replaced every day, children eat milk, I will do with a hot towel hot compress, finally scare, without what big question, but a few of my husband closed heart, this is my most chilling place, "how do you so much trouble, my mom said we had two, never had mastitis." My mother said, "my mother said" it is, since birth, the word has become a pet phrase in husband mouth, my mom says you can't do on the child, my mom says you can't do that, why don't you ask my mom, I hate not a big mouth fan in the past, your mother has not said let you take good care of me for me?

Let me the most sad is that change to my husband, often because of some trivial quarrel broke out, he became won't listen to reason, motionless, such a long face, children have a fever diarrhea, always blame the two, "what do you think of the child?" "Every day, nothing to do, the child can not good?" "Every day, how to eat this? You do not eat?" "My salary is all in your hands? Every day you will give me this treatment?" When I heard these words, he couldn't help, fried, every night I woke up several times he know? My day in addition to coax a child, and laundry, care not finish, finish up chores, with children, but also to buy food to cook, if he did not come home, I be so tired? I don't have to eat, feed the children who gave me a hand for me to sleep through the night?

Look in the mirror as if the old woman with dishevelled hair and a dirty face, ten years old, the shelf had dried up day cream, night cream, has quickly dried eyeliner, lipstick, expired mask, these are laughing at me, reminding me of the original clear days no longer exist, I have three days five days do not wash your face, a record that never before, hate not one day a wash, not unwinding ordered unwinding ordered who dare to go out? Can I give birth to the child, the thick skinned several times, who love to see who I am, much better than the original one.

Most make me want to cry is sick, can not drink milk can suck out the drained, children do not drink milk and I'll give her cook millet soup, I dragged the body, but also to take care of the baby, then I could not help but also back home, call my husband is not connected, then could not pick me up when I live, my mother's face to his "evil" husband grumble again, tears, my mother cried, my husband said,"Wife, I'm sorry, I don't know you so hard"I don't know, laugh, not to feel? To see it? Don't let the children a father blind? He only knew that the wife of his less attention, but do not think her attention to which, he only knew the wife become bloated and sloppy, she does not know the heart of suffering and helpless, he only knew the woman to have children. Never know the sad and hard work, he only remember his mother is a mother, but also forget, in front of this woman is also a mother.

Fortunately, the husband later changed, changed in the past, no longer on her toe, but fortunately we don't live together, she continued her jump square dance, my husband and I will be quiet, I just got through, although the child still hurts, but at least the joy and hope. Before the treasure mother because of postpartum depression jumping Dutch Act I do not have this treasure, mother so unfortunate, I am reminded of the All sufferings have their reward., years of groundless talk, like a dream for me is a Cuilian me more cherish life, in the way of raising children, I have a lot of difficulties to customer service but, I'm not a little afraid, also hope that in the way Po mom, come together, through the first year of the most sad.